Saturday, January 01, 2005

Tsunami Appeal

Hi guys

Sorry for the long hiatus. I've been busy eating chipolatas, and telling my nine year old nephew to stop drinking my Tanqueray. I have also been watching a lot of TV, some of it rather unexpected.

I'm talking, of course, about this awful tsunami disaster. I'm sure there isn't one of us who hasn't been touched by the terrible scenes of death and despair.

In the light of these gut-wrenching events, I am going to make an appeal.

The name of my appeal is: The Sean Thomas Thai Prostitute Relief Fund.

Here's the gist. If I can get the sponsorship, I propose to fly out to Thailand, one of the worst hit countries. Once there, I aim to have sex with maybe a hundred nut-brown teenage whores, paying them with YOUR kindly donated money.

OK, I know a hundred sounds a lot. How can one man be willing to undertake this kind of arduous relief work all on his own? I'm not sure there is an answer to that, but I do know that someone just has to do it. Because, let's face it, these poor girls, these poor, starving, bar-less little go go dancers with tight denim hotpants, they really need our business right now. This is not a time for us to turn our backs.

I hope you will all feel able to give generously. Just $10 could buy me a blow job, and save a seventeen year old microskirted Cambodian hooker from a terrible fate. In giving me fellatio, these girls will also, of course, be gaining much-needed protein.

Please contact the Sean Thomas Thai Prostitute Relief Fund through the toffeewomble.

Thankyou.

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